On that awful 'Asian Girlz' song

[Content note: Racism, misogyny, rape.]

Okay, so, I guess we have to talk about this song, "Asian Girlz", and its video, which have been making the rounds on the Internet. I'm almost too tired to even write about this shit. I don't just mean tired at this moment, I mean in general. But here we go. Thankfully, Angry Asian Man provides all the summary you need, plus a transcript of the lyrics.

I have not brought myself to watch the video, but the lyrics are so nonsensically racist and sexist that I was almost convinced the whole thing was a parody of Asian fetishism. Not that that would make it instantly unproblematic, mind, but that's how ridiculous this song is. What also struck me is that there are actually quite a few references that show awareness of Asian (American) culture. I mean, yeah, the usual stereotypes are there--fried rice, ninjas, dragons--but boba tea? Shark fin soup? These are not things I expect the average white racist to be familiar with. I immediately thought, I bet this band is from LA, which a little Googling confirms. I'm guessing the place names in the song would be another giveaway, if you're familiar with that area.

We actually have something of a cultural milestone here. This is Asian American fetishism, perpetrated by dudes who presumably see and interact with real Asian Americans all the time. Asians: reliably exotic, even when they're totally familiar! 'Forever foreigner' syndrome--you're looking at it.

Of course, these lyrical geniuses accompanied their video with the usual sad disclaimer of self-unaware privilege hogs everywhere:

It's a joke, we're making fun of ourselves, we LOVE Asian women, we have an Indonesian band member, &c., &c. I've got bingo!

I don't have time to go into all the ways this song fails at both not-racism and self-parody, but I think they should be pretty obvious. I do want to address, though, the band's description of their song as an "endearing & submissive...tribute" to Asian women. I don't know about you, but I don't find anything endearing or submissive about this lyric:

It's the Year of the Dragon
Ninja pussy I'm stabbin'

I know, I know, it's a JOKE, because it's not like sexual violence is a REAL THING that happens to women ALL THE TIME. Lighten up! Nothing to see here--just some guys reducing a woman to a body part, which they talk about stabbing.

Or these:

Come on sit on my lap (right here baby)
Or we'll send you back
And you age so well
I can barely tell
17 or 23?
Baby doesn't matter to me

Boy, the only thing funnier than sexual coercion by threat of deportation is statutory rape!

Band dudes: If you really wanted to write a tribute to Asian women (rather than a tribute to your personal wank fantasies), you might consider that some of the Asian women who hear your song will have experienced sexual violence and most of them will have experienced racist treatment, and to them your song will sound like nothing more than a litany of the same hurtful garbage, regardless of your intentions.

I'm sure these dudes would say they "love" Asian women, which just points out another problem: the conflation of "love" and "respect". You can "love" an object, but you can't respect one. (Quite literally, fetishism is love of an object.) When you, a stranger, insist that you "love" me, that is not flattering, and it is not harmless, because it's an objectifying, dehumanizing love. It's a selfish love, so keep it the fuck to yourself.

As a parting thought, I bet these d-bags are kept really busy hollering 'konichiwa' or 'ni hao' at every Asian American woman they see. It's a wonder they even have time to craft masterworks like this one.

PS. 3...2...1...wahhhhhhh, CENSORSHIP!!